“God selected the common and the castoff, whatever lacks status, so that He could invalidate the claims of those who think they are significant.” -1 Corinthians 1:28 (the Voice)
Today is the first day of my sabbatical. It is 6am and I have already checked my work email 4 times. Four. Times.
How am I doing?
It turns out everyone at work is taking this sabbatical thing pretty seriously. I have no new emails requiring anything of me. No voicemail’s I’ve put off until today. No last things that I need to wrap up.
Nobody is asking for my input on pressing matters or how to navigate personal or professional differences. Practically our entire staff at Holy Yoga is new and they seem to be doing just fine without any direction from me.
This morning, sabbatical feels less like rest and more like insignificance.
The definition of an idol is, “something that consumes you while in pursuit, disappoints you when you have it and devastates you when you lose it.” Could it be that Holy Yoga, while a good and fruitful pursuit, has become something of an idol for me?
I think I have allowed the roles I have played as wife, mother, founder, daughter, and friend to define me more than the truth of who God says I am.
I suppose the sobering truth is that the first order of business for this season of rest is addressing my deep need to contribute in order to feel significant.
So for today… this is my question of the King.
Do I really matter to people or projects or You, God, if I don’t bring something to the table?
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